Saturday, February 19, 2005

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING... FRUSTRATED...

"People need trouble. A little frustration to sharpen the spirit on, toughen it. I don't mean you need to live in a rathole or a gutter, but you have to learn fortitude, endurance. Only vegetables are happy."



Gibberish

Right... I am alive.. I am blogging

B3lieve me... I'm kinda depressed these daezz...

I've basically lost the motivation to do anything... everything in fact... except for waking up and sleeping... doing things that is required of me.. like goin for classes... takin medicine.. n... feel sick...

hahaaa...

What have I done these past weeks... it all seemed to be a blur to me... but does it matter really? I don't recall much at all... and it doesn't seems to matter... is not anything worth remembering too...

But... rather.. I recall things about the past (way in the past) vividly than anything that happened.. say.. even yesterday...

Things that I thought I did without fully being into it... like my JC life...

Right.. I got to admit.. I nv try to experience my college life fully... the fact was.. I never bothered..

In that brief period of time... not followin school rules seems to be my subconscious agenda in being in school...

I was always late.. quite intentionally... most of the time... so I do not need to be bothered with the national anthem n pledge

I tried to come as late as possible whenever there is morning PE..

I did not tie up my hair and even got it dyed in J2.. juz to test the school limit.. right.. and I did stupid things like copying down the disciplinary teacher's timetable so I knew how to avoid her while goin for classes...

I skipped a lot of classes... at first I would still get MCs to cover up.. but I kinda get bored and open about it... I juz got lazy getting them...

n the last and final thing which I felt a little (juz a little guilty of) I nv really try to know anyone in school... to me.. school was school.. n nothing else...

It doesn't seem serious at all.. of coz.. I mean.. hey... at least I'm not the sort who go clubbing, drinking, smoking or do drugs.. my results are OK too.. juz a person who kept her distance from the rowdy crowd.. n I bet loads of people did this at some point of their life

Oh... why m I saying all these in my blog anyway... mb I'm realli sick... too sick to care...

The thing is... memory is good as long as you forget about the past...

sounds paradoxical... but there is some truth in it...

isn't it?